Stories shape who we are and how we see the world

Welcome!

My name is Nicole Conner. I am the founder and director of Defining Stories.

I grew up in a home of storytellers. Stories that gifted me with a sense of identity and belonging, something I would only appreciate decades later. This story-telling way of life drew me into narrative therapy where I found resonance in the idea that we can learn to tell our stories with meaning and purpose. We are the experts of our stories!

Stories have a lasting impact on our lives. They shape how we see ourselves. Sometimes meaningful stories are ‘hijacked’ or hidden by 'problem' stories. These problem stories can be overwhelming, silencing what is precious to us. So in narrative therapy I walk alongside people to help them deconstruct the problem stories and invite them to tell and retell stories that offer hope and healing. How is that possible? Because you are not your problem story: the Problem is the Problem. 

Once we have untangled the problem stories we begin to re-author your life stories. What do you hope for? Value? Dream about? What are the skills and knowledges you have that have protested and resisted the dominant problem stories? We begin the exploration of this giant atlas called your life - and it brims with possibilities.

I can help you become aware of yourself as a storyteller, to challenge the problem stories, and to tell your stories in ways that align with what you value.